What has to happen for a kid to say this to a teacher? Can you think of a time a student has said it to you? Why do you think they said it?
Maybe it’s taboo to try and be the favourite. I don’t think the point is being the favourite for some silly ego reason. But when you’re a student’s favourite teacher, you have an important power for change and an important responsibility.
To me, being the favourite means the student respects you and cares what you think. That’s a pretty great entry point for teaching or making a positive impact on their life.
It’s about belief
For a student to respect you and care about the work you do together, they have to believe certain things about you. Here’s a profile of beliefs a student must have toward their favourite teacher:
- My teacher cares what I think
- My teacher listens to me and gives me space and time to share my thoughts
- I am safe to make mistakes
- My teacher would never embarrass me in front of others
- I know that I will be met with kindness from my teacher no matter what
The question then becomes how do we install these beliefs in our students?
Well, if beliefs are just things we think are true, then truth comes from evidence. And evidence for the above would change from person to person. What has to happen for you to feel listened to and respected will be different to someone else’s rules for this.
So, listen. And perhaps start with the kind of evidence you might need. The adage to treat others the way you would like to be treated is useful here.
How would you like others to show you that you can trust them? Would you shout at them if they make a mistake or offend you? Maybe… but that might be an extreme place to start testing and may damage future tests…
Start with kind eyes. Listen more than talk. Assume they have the best intentions.
What you believe about people will affect how they operate toward you, almost like magic.
For instance, what would happen if you simply believed that every student you interact with is doing the best they can with what they’ve got? How would it change your impulses to their acting out or ‘misbehaving’?
To be the favourite, give ample evidence to warrant it.
