It can feel like a waste of precious class time to chat with students about their day. We have limited class time so surely it makes sense to just get on with the learning, right?!
One of my favourite ways to start a waiata lesson is to get a sense of what the kids have been up to since I last saw them.
“What have you been learning today?”
“What’s something surprising you could teach me about?!”
“What are your plans for the holidays?”
These seem simple, but hidden beneath these questions is a core Māori value:
Whānaungatanga.
You might notice whanaungatanga has the Māori word for family in it; whānau. It’s all about a building a sense of family. It’s just like how Japanese business people highly value starting with ‘small talk’ before of ‘getting down to business’. I’ve heard a business deal can be completetly ruined if someone doesn’t engage in small talk first; it’s considered rude!
Well, this is similar in the Māori world. It’s not as formal as having a set of questions or steps you need to do to ‘do whānaungatanga’ (can you imagine!?)
It’s really about being human first. You’re meeting a human being who has had a whole day before this moment, they have family, friends, insecurities, hopes- the whole shabang. How wonderful then that whānaungatanga gives us space to honour that.
It doesn’t have to be a therapy session! Just get interested in their reality and let them into yours.
So when I’m with kids I’ll start by treating them like family members I’m curious about. By the way people tend to act like how you treat them. And I want my students to engage with our work together like trusted family members.
It may seem insignificant, but small talk is anything but.
